Greetings, commanders. Recently whilst working a Thursday night shift at the drive-through window of my oppressive place of labor, I found myself bored by the humdrum of the evening. Therefore, I needed to make the time more interesting, and crept into the office. In this closet of a room I utilized the printer and produced massive amounts of bookmarks, which I proceeded to sneak into the more “nerdy” customers.
(nerd: potential candidate for enlistment based upon appearance and psychological observation)
By this method I was able to distribute over fifty (50) pieces of propaganda over the course of a work week to appreciative candidates.