E.P.I.C.B.A.T.T.L.E. = Epic Success!

Those who came will never forget, and those who missed it should never do so again (yes, there is already talk of E.P.I.C.B.A.T.T.L.E. 2.0)!

Divisions attending included members from #669 Pitchfork Brigade, #242 Pennsylvania Militia, #1867 United Playland Northern Frontier, #315 Dr. Steel’s Own Robot Monkeys, and #9001 Central and Eastern Virginia Division. Most (maybe all?) attendees also represented the Foam Defense Core (FDC) and a myriad of other Special Ops.

A handful of #669 members infiltrated Audra State Park a few days early and installed robots and decoy tents to ensure the reservation of adequate campsite space for the bulk of the E.P.I.C.B.A.T.T.L.E. force. By 18:00 on Friday, June 12th, all attending soldiers were accounted for and preparing for the following day’s epic foam conflict!

E.P.I.C.B.A.T.T.L.E. events began Saturday morning as brave toy soldiers piled into Soldier Cyrex’s pick-up truck, weapons in hand and Dr. Steel flag brandished high, to travel up the mountain and into the woods for the Field Combat event. Three rounds of epic combat tested the prowess of FDC members in marksmanship and swordplay. Brave warriors fell and mighty heroes rose as speed, subterfuge, brute force, and even epic betrayal were woven into the conflict. In the end, there could be only one victor, and glory shone upon Jr. Acoustics Engineer Ryan of #242. Medical Officer Arche and Colonel James Towne (both of the #9001) came in second and third, respectively.

E.P.I.C.B.A.T.T.L.E. events were continued back in Utopian Playland with one-on-one epic sword sparring! Willing warriors drew straws and were entered into a bracket for toy soldier versus toy soldier swordplay. The action was intense and the skills evenly matched as soldiers battled for victory, and the chance to whip Lieutenant Colonel Draco’s backside. It was Seabass of the #669 who earned that honor and took advantage of his prize!

The final two events were in marksmanship with an Alien Illuminati Target Shoot and Barrel Shoot. Toy Soldiers hog tied aliens to cans and trees and then took aim with their foam lasers to teach those pesky aliens a lesson! The target shoot was a sweep for the #9001 (hereafter dubbed “9000-and-win”) with Soldier Fukushuu (a.k.a. Frenchy) claiming the highest honors and his division mates, Medical Officer Arche and Colonel James Towne, nabbing second and third places, respectively. The barrel shoot won the #9001st another medal with Medical Officer Arche claiming the ultimately victory, Colonel Canker Canison of the #1867 and #315 winning second, and Codename RedDrgn of the #669 grabbing third.

Before, after, and in between E.P.I.C.B.A.T.T.L.E. events were plenty of weird and wacky fun including playground antics, singing (often in tune!), glow stick sculpting, swimming (a.k.a. being washed away), foil hat crafting, pitchfork hot dog/mallow roasting, and good humor. In the end, no one wanted to pack up and go home (we had even befriended the park rangers!), but we left in good spirits, having had a great time, the pleasure of getting meet epic soldiers, and in anticipation of future foam conflicts and other events.

Keep an eye on the main thread for more photos and videos as attendees are able to download, process, and share some digital fun!